As human beings living in a complex world, experiencing a certain degree of anxiety is a natural phenomenon. Anxiety is a survival mechanism that keeps us alert to potential dangers in our environment and respond with the necessary caution. It is when anxiety becomes intense or chronic, and begins to control our thoughts and behaviors, that it can become damaging.
When we repeatedly focus our thinking and imagination on negative scenarios, the brain can trigger a cascade of biochemical responses, including the release of stress hormones such as cortisol. It prepares the body to face a threat as though the catastrophic scenarios we have constructed in our minds were actually happening. We may consequently remain in a constant state of fight or flight, reacting to imagined threats and anticipating how badly things could turn out at any given moment.
When this pattern of thinking, imagining, and feeling continues over time, our perception of reality can become deeply distorted. We may find ourselves constantly bracing for life's challenges rather than meeting them with the mental and emotional resources we need. Over time, chronic anxiety can also contribute to feelings of helplessness, emotional exhaustion, and depression.
Dr. Hans Selye, a pioneer in the field of stress research, famously wrote: “It is not stress that kills us, it is our reaction to it.”
Our level of anxiety often grows in proportion to the amount of attention and emotional energy we give to a particular stream of thought. A chronic state of anxiety can influence our ability to make decisions and, at times, become paralyzing. The anxious person may feel safer avoiding action and taking risks. Gradually, life can become a prison built around the avoidance of suffering.
Sadly, once anxiety becomes an ingrained pattern, it can be difficult to break. We become so familiar with the feelings it generates that they may begin to feel strangely predictable. Even though anxiety is uncomfortable, this familiarity can create a sense of emotional certainty.
Getting to the Deeper Truth About Anxiety
I believe that, at a deeper level, anxiety can be linked to a fear of living. It is often rooted in a fear of the unknown, an apprehension about life's uncertainties, and a reluctance to embrace the journey because of the potential pain, disappointment, and failure it may bring.
In order to create substantial changes in our emotional patterns and move beyond anxiety, let us expand the way we perceive our human experience. Here are some of my thoughts on how to approach life and navigate its challenges in ways that can help reduce anxiety and restore a greater sense of freedom.
Choose Long-Term Success
Have you ever considered that the quality of your life might be determined, in part, by how you respond to your negative experiences? As so many successful people have demonstrated, repeated failures can become stepping stones to success.
How much discomfort are you willing to experience in pursuit of your objectives? Whatever it is you say you want, whether it is love, a fulfilling relationship, financial success, a great body, or optimal health, do you want it enough to move beyond the discomfort that may stand between you and your objective?
Growth often requires us to tolerate uncertainty, make mistakes, and accept that the path toward success will not always be comfortable.
Face Reality
We can only begin to make meaningful changes when we are willing to face reality. When it comes to maintaining an honest relationship with ourselves, it is counterproductive to ignore the negative aspects of our experience and bury them beneath a layer of positive thinking.
Repression and denial can contribute to emotional distress and anxiety. Difficult situations and uncomfortable emotions need to be acknowledged and expressed before we can begin to process them and find a resolution. Mindfulness allows us to observe what is happening within us without judgment, rather than constantly trying to escape what we feel.
Don't Run Away
Procrastinating on resolving an issue or confronting a challenging situation can create ongoing stress. No matter how much we wish it were otherwise, problems rarely resolve themselves simply because we choose to ignore them.
An important part of our personal journey is developing the courage to face difficult situations, communicate honestly, and address what needs to be addressed. Sometimes this means taking action; at other times, it means accepting what cannot be changed and finding the strength to move on.
Take Action
Anxiety often increases when we remain undecided about something significant in our lives or fail to take the steps necessary to move forward.
The bigger our ego becomes, the more difficult it can be to accept the possibility of making mistakes. We may become so concerned with getting everything right that we end up doing nothing at all.
Have you noticed how your stress level can decrease once you move beyond doubt, make a decision, and choose a direction? Taking action does not guarantee the outcome we desire, but it gives us back a sense of participation in our own lives.
Put Things in Perspective
Remind yourself how many times you have made situations in your mind seem much bigger than they actually were, and how much energy you spent worrying about them.
What feels overwhelming today may look entirely different tomorrow. A situation that seems extremely important in the present may become insignificant a week, a month, or a year from now.
Author Danielle LaPorte offers this powerful perspective:
“P.S.: You’re not going to die. Here’s the white-hot truth: if you go bankrupt, you’ll still be okay. If you lose the gig, the lover, the house, you’ll still be okay. If you sing off-key, get beat by the competition, have your heart shattered, get fired…it’s not going to kill you. Ask anyone who’s been through it.”
In Closing
It may be worth reminding yourself that nothing is worth sacrificing your health and well-being. Life will inevitably bring uncertainty, disappointment, and unexpected challenges. But you do not have to anticipate every possible difficulty or solve every problem before allowing yourself to live.
You cannot control everything that happens to you, but you can develop a different relationship with uncertainty, with your thoughts, and with the experiences life brings your way.
As long as you remain connected to yourself and retain the courage to move forward, there is always room for a new beginning. Life can change for the better in the very next moment.